Ok, I needed to write something down before I blew up. How in the world can "It may or may not work" be a valid answer for not wanting to get involved with someone. May or may not is the way of the world.... its what happens each and everyday. Its something that we live with and have to deal with everyday. Who am I to say I'm not gonna do something cuz I may fail at it. I may as well lay down and die now because I dont want to attempt anything and not have it work out. I guess that's so easy to say when there is nothing on the line, so what if there is. What if something that you care for alot is hanging in the balance of this may or may not situation.... would you want to risk it. --------------------------STOP EVERYTHING------------ :| That's basically how it is right now. I think its safe to say I should look forward.



I'm gonna write this down so that I make sure to get all my thoughts lined up and my side clear. I really do think that this whole issue of being friends with someone and then turning that into a relationship, is one that's gonna be on my top 10 list of things to talk about. I don't really think there are too many people who share the same point of view as me, but thats not gonna deter me from how I feel about it. Well now that I think about it my parents probably side with me since they were friends before they were together. So that's 2 people to the side of TJ. Now let's see if I can get into the whole nitty gritty of the issue. Why are people so afraid of it, why do they think it is so destined for doom, and can it actually work.
For one I think having a relationship with a person who was your friend first is some kind of urban legend. Everybody's mother-sister-cousin has a horror story of when they had a romantic relationship with a friend that went wrong and it was never the same after. So those horror stories fuel the minds and hearts of people because they never want that same horror to fall upon them. They might as well make a horror movie about it since its so damn frightening. I mean it gets to the point to where when you bring up the subject the only thing that gets discussed is what happens when it doesn't work. What happens when it does work? Where are the horror stories about how people were such good friends and they pursued something more and it turned out great. You never hear about that. Those don't make the good stories, those aren't the ones you can sit and talk about with your friends...the things that went good. Even when I'm sitting around talking with my friends, all the ignorant crazy shit I've done in the past is all that gets talked about. Well I honestly don't think that people will stop being afraid of it or start doing it more just cuz one guy has a different opinion about it. You may not want to disturb what is going on with whatever friendship and you definitely couldnt take it if it didnt work out well. So I can understand why some may feel frightened of it.
Unfortunately starting a relationship with a friend always seems to get that "Doomed to Fail" Stamp of approval. I mean why is that when people always seem to want to get to know their partner on that same sort of level. But if you happen to find someone on that same level beforehand then its all wrong. What is so wrong with it?!? I guess I'm biased because I would want someone to be my friend first. I guess that's kind of like sabotage then, If I start off seeing it as being able to advance to the next stage and not the other person...that's not fair. I think I probably need to look at it that way. For me to say that I would like to be in a relationship with someone I was friends with first is kind of a setup for anyone I become friends with. They're thinking of the situation as friends only and here I am thinking of more than that. So I think I need to look at it from another way then.... I may have to rethink my stance on what I've been doing lately. So how do I get to know someone without being close enough to get to be too good of friends but still be cool enough to where I can learn enough about them to be able to see if its a good match. It used to be so easy before.... I didnt really worry about matching and fitting, if she was pretty then it was cool. I guess I have grown a little bit to know that I want more than that. I guess the only thing I wanted now was something that lasts. I'm not trying to get involved with something that is gonna end a few months from now. I'm not gonna dwell on it too much longer though, I think after writing this I'll probably be well vented and pretty much done.
Why do I think it would work? My parents.... My dad and my stepmother were good friends before they were together and they're doin good. Why else do I think it would work.... If I was in that situation I would want it to work. I don't think what I have to say could really satisfy the masses but its a start for me.


To My Best Friend?
by Shannbodan


This is for the greatest person
that I have ever known.
Being away from you for so long
I am feeling so alone.
With you I am so happy
you keep my heart content.
But I had to be a volunteer -
so off to England I went.
That is where I found my heart
and how I feel for you.
I try so hard to deny this feeling
and I don't know what to do.
I said that I would never again
let someone take my heart.
And here I'm sitting wanting you
and hate that we're apart.
Everyday you are in my thoughts,
every night you're in my dreams.
I can't believe what's happening,
is this really what it seems?
I know you're only wanting
to be the best of friends,
but I am asking you sincerely
if it's your rule you'll bend.
To take a chance to know me
to let me share it all.
And maybe one day very soon
for me one day you'll fall.
Our friendship we now have
is something that I'd miss
but maybe once we let go
we will find eternal bliss.



http://www.loveforum.net/showthread.php?t=591